25 August 2009

I'm a jerk.

Well, I figured out why Chelsea's mad at me.
And now I can go from being depressed to feeling like a complete and utter jerk.
I said what I said because I was depressed and pissed off and jealous.
I'm sorry.
See, like my mother said, I'm controlled by my emotions and because of my stupid emotions, I pissed off my best friend to the point that she didn't want to talk to me.
I am such an asshole.
I thought knowing why she was mad at me would help me feel better, but it doesn't.
It just makes me feel worse.
I might go cry now.
Or at least try to cry because I haven't cried since 8th grade.
Yay for being a horrible friend.
This is exactly why people don't like me.
I am mean.
I piss people off.
This is exactly why I would prefer to just be left alone.
Then I can't hurt other people.
I'm fucking horrible.
oh wow, I've actually started to cry.
I'm so fucking horrible.
And apparently, Sally's pissed at me too.
I'm sorry to her too.
I'm pretty much the lowest scum on the earth now.
This is why I avoid people.
I eventually find a way to screw it up.
Even though they are great people and no one could ask for better friends,
I still find some way to fuck it up.
Way to go, Jordan.

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